My name is Lexa. I am 19 and I recently found out what Maladaptive Daydreaming was when searching about my abnormal fantasies that I have had ever since I can remember. I never have been able to talk to anyone about them because I always feel like I might be crazy or I don't know. I have never thought that somebody else might have these same daydreams as me. Since I was younger, I always have imagined having different parents. Sometimes I would get hooked on a show or movie, other times I can use someone in real life and imagine what my life would be like. I feel crazy sometimes because I don't want to have these thought, many times I feel guilty because I have a good life. I want to believe that I don't need these thoughts. I resent my parents a-lot, I don't want to but I truly have never felt loved or supported so when I meet someone who cares about me-actually takes interest in me or that I am very similar to- I create this other world with them as my family members. I imagine living this other life and feeling loved. I know- I know- I still feel crazy saying this. I also like to listen to music for HOURS and I pace back and forth while daydreaming. It sometimes helps me fall asleep when my daydreams are happy thoughts. I know many people with Maladaptive daydreaming create people- Idk I just am hoping to find someone to talk to that has similar thoughts and dreams like me. I just am sick of being alone and want to cope with this better. So please if anyone is out there- reach out!
I'm pretty sure that's where my MD stems from too. I feel like I've been neglected by my parents a lot and I began daydreaming to create the parents that I wanted or rather the love feeling. Initially it was me as a child with perfect caring parents then it shifted to me being the parent but the feeling I tried to feel was the same. This was just my way to cope. You are definitely not alone in this!
Thank you so much for sharing this Lexa. What I have going on is pretty similar in many ways. I also tend to use people I know in real life, mostly teachers I’ve had, as parental figures or supportive figures in my daydreams. I will make up fake situations or conversations in my head where I am the center of attention and really entertaining, smart, and funny. I feel really screwed up for doing this, but I can’t seem to stop because it makes me feel so good about myself at least temporarily. My actual parents never treated me too horribly either, but I have always felt a lack of affection from them— so maybe that’s partially what caused me to be like this. I am just very very glad to know I’m not alone, this is proof that what we are experiencing is a real phenomenon and at least somewhat out of our control. If you ever want to talk I won’t judge literally at all since I do the same shit.
Hi Lexa I have had something like this as my main theme up until a year or a year and half now when my main theme changed. I always imagined parental figures from novels or teachers from real life or sometimes self help speakers as my parent. My parents are really good but I don't know why I used to do it. In my family we don't express feelings of affection, like we don't say things like I love you or hug etc. This is OK in my culture. So I would imagine those things in my head. I think not being able to express emotions in real life is what played a big role in me getting MD. Because I remember as a kid I was not very expressive, I am still not. But now I try to at least say the things.
Post by kezdoesthings on Aug 27, 2020 22:34:22 GMT
Lexa you are not alone I also imagine having a different family which does make me feel guilty because while my family life isn't perfect I love my mother with all my heart. I often spend hours MDing with music and that's okay. Please remember that while those people in your head can feel real and socializing with them feels like your really talking to another person do try to find people in your real life that make you feel like the characters in your head do