I actually didn't know that this is a disorder i really feel upset i thought what i am doing was normal. I am a fan girl of this person i look up to her i really like her more that an idol she change me in so many ways she's also the reason why i am curious about my gender. It started last year i guess, i was in to fictional stories about her i started to dream about me and her together i know its ridiculous but until now am still making scenes on my mind about us being together in my dreams we have a child i feel happy and at the same time my head hurts whenever i force to think about it when i force to picture the scene on my mind.because of that whenever i see a video of her performing wearing appropriate cloths i get mad/ upset i barely watch her videos because of that i am jelouse when she's with another person. I thought what i am doing is normal so i made it a habit i didn't know this stuffs i really feel upset right now help me what should i do?
That kind of thinking isn't super healthy, but it is pretty common among MDers and is becoming increasingly common in non-MDers who are a part of the "stan culture" that's popular around public figures these days. If you want to stop daydreaming about that particular person, perhaps you could try to break up with them and mourn the relationship the same way you would a real life one. However, this can be very emotionally taxing, so I would only recommend it if you're feeling otherwise fairly emotionally stable.
Don't give up what you want most for what you want now.