Post by wendy on Dec 13, 2018 22:07:49 GMT
Hello! My name is Wendy, it's been a while since I last wrote in a forum so I hope I got this right.
Though I've been part of other MD communities in the past few years, this is the first real introduction I write. Seeing the site so active made me want to share. I've been daydreaming as long as I can remember honestly, since I was 5 maybe 6. I remember my dad asking me what I was
quite often as a child, so I was probably prone to distraction and long silences more than other children were. I was a very lonely and anxious child, and due to my parents job I moved cities and countries quite often. I got used to being the odd one out. My main trigger is music and being a passenger in a moving vehicle (cars,planes ecc). My daydreams started with the characters of the books I loved as a child (mainly Harry Potter), but soon it became a sort of coping meccanism for my poor self esteem,I would imagine myself in situations where I was the best version of myself, some kind of heroic alter-ego who could save me from the mess I really was. Luckily, I have a very loving family and some great friends, and though the MD did stop me from achieving some of my goals, I managed to hold on to reality enough to have a normal life. Today I am 24, a uni student and a private teacher. My main issue is my lack of concentration: when I am alone and have to complete a task it is extremely hard for me to not slip into MD, and the more I grow up the worse it gets. I have to finish university soon but studying is becoming a real challenge. In the past weeks living alone my MD has increased exponentially, I've been pacing around for hours, and when I finish I feel groggy and tired, like If I had a bad hangover. I do not aim to stop completely, I wouldn't know who I am without my daydreaming, but just to keep it under control enough to achieve my goals and not feel like a failure or a burden to the people around me. The only person I told this to is my boyfriend, but though he tried being supportive he really couldn't understand what I was talking about, or how serious the problem really is.
I wrote a lot so I just want to add one last thing: reading your stories has giving me an incredible strength. I have hidden this from everyone I love for all my life, I never knew how to face the embarrassment. Writing it down is liberating and healing, so thank you so much.
ps: sorry for spelling mistakes, I've been juggling a few languages.
Though I've been part of other MD communities in the past few years, this is the first real introduction I write. Seeing the site so active made me want to share. I've been daydreaming as long as I can remember honestly, since I was 5 maybe 6. I remember my dad asking me what I was
quite often as a child, so I was probably prone to distraction and long silences more than other children were. I was a very lonely and anxious child, and due to my parents job I moved cities and countries quite often. I got used to being the odd one out. My main trigger is music and being a passenger in a moving vehicle (cars,planes ecc). My daydreams started with the characters of the books I loved as a child (mainly Harry Potter), but soon it became a sort of coping meccanism for my poor self esteem,I would imagine myself in situations where I was the best version of myself, some kind of heroic alter-ego who could save me from the mess I really was. Luckily, I have a very loving family and some great friends, and though the MD did stop me from achieving some of my goals, I managed to hold on to reality enough to have a normal life. Today I am 24, a uni student and a private teacher. My main issue is my lack of concentration: when I am alone and have to complete a task it is extremely hard for me to not slip into MD, and the more I grow up the worse it gets. I have to finish university soon but studying is becoming a real challenge. In the past weeks living alone my MD has increased exponentially, I've been pacing around for hours, and when I finish I feel groggy and tired, like If I had a bad hangover. I do not aim to stop completely, I wouldn't know who I am without my daydreaming, but just to keep it under control enough to achieve my goals and not feel like a failure or a burden to the people around me. The only person I told this to is my boyfriend, but though he tried being supportive he really couldn't understand what I was talking about, or how serious the problem really is. I wrote a lot so I just want to add one last thing: reading your stories has giving me an incredible strength. I have hidden this from everyone I love for all my life, I never knew how to face the embarrassment. Writing it down is liberating and healing, so thank you so much.
ps: sorry for spelling mistakes, I've been juggling a few languages.
