hiiii!! this is basically just me ranting and telling you my MD story. i dont go to therapy anymore and i never told anyone about this so i am just looking for advice?
when i was little i would play dollhouse alllll the time, like by myself and i would make extreme stories and a lot of times pause and just sit there and stare off into space about what should happen next and everything. when i got a little bit older, maybe middle school age, i would lay in bed every night and play with my stuffed animals. i was pretty much always a character in the stories and i started to do this often, until it turned into pretty much every night. once i got rid of my stuffed animals i turned to invisible people which i still do to this day. i would lay in bed and pretend my blanket was a dress for parties or stuff like that. i would do this all in bed but i would whisper and imagine very vividly everything that was happening. now i get up out of bed most nights and turn on music and just daydream with invisible people. to be honest its fun and i never really have had a problem with it or thought it was bad but now that i know that this is a thing i feel like it might be impacting me a lot more than i thought.
basically i am a senior in high school right now and i have no friends. i havent had friends for all of high school since i moved in freshman year. honestly i am fine with it because i am on social media and talk to a lot of people online but i feel like maybe the daydreaming might be why i dont care to make or keep friends. even when i have friends i dont care if they gradually stop talking to me because i know when i go home i will have my fake stories and fantasies. i dont know if i have social anxiety or if i am just extremely introverted, but i have always thought that social anxiety was the reason why i didnt have friends,, but maybe this daydreaming has been bigger than i thought? up until two-ish years ago it hadnt really been like EVERY single night, but now it def is. i read that it develops because of trauma but i dont think i have any trauma from my early childhood (tbh i cant remember most of it which ik is also a sign of trauma but my parents are really good and my brothers are too so i have no idea).
what do u guys think? am i overthinking this? should i stop daydreaming? idk if this is actually that big of a deal but i currently struggle with self harm and possible social anxiety and i have gone to therapy in the past for about a year but i never brought up this daydreaming thing to her or anyone else. i stopped going bc it wasn’t really helping and i would just lie to her a lot. do u think i should go back to therapy for daydreaming? if yes what do i even say . anyways, this is a lot longer than i thought it would be. i hope this makes sense and thanks for reading
also idk how this forum works so lets hope yall can respond because if not this would be awkward lmfaoooo
Post by blueberrymuffin on Dec 7, 2020 23:34:51 GMT
You sound like a very creative person and you definitely make it sound like a gift It’s only maladaptive if it interferes with your daily life. MD had a bad influence on my personal relationships so I can relate. Once I stopped daydreaming I started to have meaningful relationships with people, and that felt more fulfilling than daydream relationships. If you can afford therapy, go for it! Just tell the therapist you think you have MD, a good therapist will learn about it if they dont already know.