I’ve been fantasising for years now. Its quite common what I dream about, me but living a better life. I’m in a different country surrounded by different people. (I don’t imagine my family in these dreams because I know that if they are in the picture this dream life I have is virtually impossible- I’m a terrible person I know). My dreams aren’t anything crazy. I’m not famous or anything. But I have talents, I am confident, I feel prettier there. I fall in love with a wonderful man (I usually base these on celebs - I go crazy basically and consume a lot of content of a celeb that’s caught my eye, my main one is a singer who writes the most beautiful songs that bring tears to my eyes. I think I dream about people like that as I wish someone would treat me like they do in songs, in real life). But I get brought back to earth and I’m reminded of how lonely and depressed and pathetic I am. I have really bad self esteem, virtually non existent. I just want this dream life for real but I know I can’t have it and that constant realisation makes life really hard. I’m rambling, but I hope it makes sense. I’ve not spoken about this in detail before.
It’s an incredibly difficult daily struggle. If possible, maybe you should seek out mental health professionals for help. Therapy and/or medication could be very beneficial to manage the symptoms of depression, feelings of loneliness, and low self esteem. Targeting the root of the problem will hopefully translate to being able to manage the maladaptive daydreaming better.
I agree with jessicach, that is really good advice. I just want to add that I do the same thing about celebs. I consume everthing about them to make them fit my daydream and I can watch the same video many many times. I am really embarrased about it, too. Then eventually I move on to another daydream, and when I look back at the celebrity and the daydream about that person, I no longer understand what the obsession was about (I understand it a little bit, they are good, charming people, but then also completely normal people). It has no connection to real life, I am not stalking them or thinking that real me should have any contact with them, but I definitely get obsessed. It is also often variations of the same story, as if I am casting characters and using them for my own emotional gain - using them as characters in my story lines. I am definitley ashamed when using real people in my daydreams. I agree that it is a self esteem thing, but so stupid, because it also makes my self esteem even worse.