Hi, i have mdd

I have mdd for as long as i can remember. I thought it at first as something good that made me use my imagination. Sometimes, I used to lock myself in bathrooms or in my room and I listened to music and started moving and daydreaming. When I was a little older, as a teen, something happened that made me become obsessed with a certain person who I had and I started to daydream about them giving me recognition. That was the way of coping for me. I started daydreaming about other people, about being the person I wanted to be and people in my life (who I didn’t know but that i admired) seeing me thrive. From that moment on, I can’t stop daydreaming. It’s my first year in uni and I have lots of exams and assignments to do and I can’t put myself to do it. I know that its bad for me but i can’t quit, the addiction is too strong. I stopped really ‘enjoying’ music because i need to daydream to it and when i dont find headphones i become anxious and start searching for them.

I have lots of friends and some are very close, i have had relatively long relationships but they dont last too long i think because my head is always in the clouds looking for triggers and through mdd i have developed a very big ego which makes me forget about everyone else and only think about me and the idea that other people have of me. I feel superior and entitled of being recognised even though i have done nothing to deserve it. I have little to no hobbies and i am always wasting my time and getting nothing done. Im so frustrated, i hate it, i hate mdd and i have told noone about it. I foresee that my future will be the same, because even though i know that this is destroying my life, i cant help doing it. Help. Has anyone stopped mdd or has any methods to stop it? It would help a lot. Thank you<3