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Post by trex56 on Mar 28, 2019 0:09:18 GMT
I guess like most of people with MD reading is a big trigger for me. I wanted to ask everyone for tips and strategies they use to read without getting lost in a daydream.
I feel like I spent most of my childhood starring at an open book and being somewhere else in my head. I used to be able to read and follow the story from the book and have my own daydream at the same time. I can't do that anymore and now I can read five pages in a row and not have a clue about what I just read. I've been trying to read for only 15 min at a time and I can stay focused on fiction books that are exciting to read, but there is a lot of non-fiction I want to read and it's hard to focus on that.
I'm struggling with movies too...I love watching movies but can only do it by myself. If a movie is bad I can't focus on it and will start daydreaming, but if a movie is good I get completely inside of the world shown in the movie and I feel every little thing just like the characters do. It's really hard to watch a movie with other people in the room because I'm having a really intense and personal experience. I'm curious if anyone else with MD experiences movies like I do? How do you guys focus on movies without getting drawn in them like in a daydream?
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Post by Sam on Mar 28, 2019 17:16:14 GMT
I also have media consumption (whether it be movies, books, tv shows, or news) as a trigger. Its actually quite irritating, as its turning something I love (reading, specifically) into something that I almost dread. However, learning to be in the present moment and to sit with all that the present moment entails (adrenaline, boredom, sadness, etc.) is a powerful tool that can be used to teach yourself not to daydream when you don't want to be daydreaming. On that note, mindfulness can really help you learn that skill. There's about five billion different resources for mindfulness on the internet, and while not all of them are good, I'm sure that if you look it up you'll find one that works for you.
Personally, while media consumption is a trigger for me, 95% of the maladaptive portion of my daydreaming takes place when I'm pacing up and down the stairs, so its very easy for me to notice that I'm getting lost in a daydream (as long as I'm paying attention; sometimes I get up and don't even notice it). In addition to mindfulness, you could try paying close attention to what you do right before or during your daydreaming so that you might be able to identify some warning signs to look out for. For me, its generally muscle tension and getting up. But it varies from person to person, so your warning signs could be completely different from mine. That's okay, the important thing is just to notice what they are so that you might be able to be more conscious about what's happening when you're watching a movie or reading a book, and thus more able to catch yourself.
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Post by Layla Farrell on Mar 28, 2019 17:25:13 GMT
I don't have problems with movies, since I don't go to cinema and don't have friends who could watch them with me. If I don't like a movie, I can just drop it. With books I tend to space a lot when they trigger me, but usually it's more a "background" thing. I'm able to read and stay focused. Being an Aspie with neurotypical traits, a limited amount of mental multitasking has never been a problem for me (but only with things that I enjoy Sarcastic smile ), my problem is actual multitasking. If the book doesn't trigger me but is still interesting, the only problem is when DD is pushing, but since I really love reading it doesn't happen too much. When I'm reading a book I keep a clock (an analogical one that makes noise) next to me: it helps to keep a minimum track of time. I even set the alarm when it's needed. Sometimes I lose myself even with these tricks, but it doesn't happen often.
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Post by trex56 on Mar 29, 2019 12:40:15 GMT
I also have media consumption (whether it be movies, books, tv shows, or news) as a trigger. Its actually quite irritating, as its turning something I love (reading, specifically) into something that I almost dread. However, learning to be in the present moment and to sit with all that the present moment entails (adrenaline, boredom, sadness, etc.) is a powerful tool that can be used to teach yourself not to daydream when you don't want to be daydreaming. On that note, mindfulness can really help you learn that skill. There's about five billion different resources for mindfulness on the internet, and while not all of them are good, I'm sure that if you look it up you'll find one that works for you. Personally, while media consumption is a trigger for me, 95% of the maladaptive portion of my daydreaming takes place when I'm pacing up and down the stairs, so its very easy for me to notice that I'm getting lost in a daydream (as long as I'm paying attention; sometimes I get up and don't even notice it). In addition to mindfulness, you could try paying close attention to what you do right before or during your daydreaming so that you might be able to identify some warning signs to look out for. For me, its generally muscle tension and getting up. But it varies from person to person, so your warning signs could be completely different from mine. That's okay, the important thing is just to notice what they are so that you might be able to be more conscious about what's happening when you're watching a movie or reading a book, and thus more able to catch yourself. I never realize there could be warning signs that a daydream is starting...that's definitely something I will start paying attention to! I did mindfulness exercises for a few weeks a while ago and gave up. I would do the exercises and couldn't tell if I was more 'in the moment' or not...I don't think I was doing it right or maybe didn't give it enough time. Do you use mindfulness? What was it like when you learned to use it? Does it take a while? I don't have problems with movies, since I don't go to cinema and don't have friends who could watch them with me. If I don't like a movie, I can just drop it. With books I tend to space a lot when they trigger me, but usually it's more a "background" thing. I'm able to read and stay focused. Being an Aspie with neurotypical traits, a limited amount of mental multitasking has never been a problem for me (but only with things that I enjoy ), my problem is actual multitasking. If the book doesn't trigger me but is still interesting, the only problem is when DD is pushing, but since I really love reading it doesn't happen too much. When I'm reading a book I keep a clock (an analogical one that makes noise) next to me: it helps to keep a minimum track of time. I even set the alarm when it's needed. Sometimes I lose myself even with these tricks, but it doesn't happen often. I used to be just like you, I could read a book and daydream at the same time..and the book or daydream would be in the 'background'. I did that in class to. I lost that ability to multitask as I got older, I think it happened when I finished school and started reading a lot less.
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Post by Sam on Mar 29, 2019 17:29:42 GMT
I also have media consumption (whether it be movies, books, tv shows, or news) as a trigger. Its actually quite irritating, as its turning something I love (reading, specifically) into something that I almost dread. However, learning to be in the present moment and to sit with all that the present moment entails (adrenaline, boredom, sadness, etc.) is a powerful tool that can be used to teach yourself not to daydream when you don't want to be daydreaming. On that note, mindfulness can really help you learn that skill. There's about five billion different resources for mindfulness on the internet, and while not all of them are good, I'm sure that if you look it up you'll find one that works for you. Personally, while media consumption is a trigger for me, 95% of the maladaptive portion of my daydreaming takes place when I'm pacing up and down the stairs, so its very easy for me to notice that I'm getting lost in a daydream (as long as I'm paying attention; sometimes I get up and don't even notice it). In addition to mindfulness, you could try paying close attention to what you do right before or during your daydreaming so that you might be able to identify some warning signs to look out for. For me, its generally muscle tension and getting up. But it varies from person to person, so your warning signs could be completely different from mine. That's okay, the important thing is just to notice what they are so that you might be able to be more conscious about what's happening when you're watching a movie or reading a book, and thus more able to catch yourself. I never realize there could be warning signs that a daydream is starting...that's definitely something I will start paying attention to! I did mindfulness exercises for a few weeks a while ago and gave up. I would do the exercises and couldn't tell if I was more 'in the moment' or not...I don't think I was doing it right or maybe didn't give it enough time. Do you use mindfulness? What was it like when you learned to use it? Does it take a while? I do practice mindfulness. I did it for a while in 2017 and then stopped, but I started up and have been doing it daily since August of 2018. The thing about mindfulness that a lot of people don't understand is that there is no real goal to it. There's no right or wrong way to do it. All it is about is sitting with and accepting everything in your present moment experience. A side effect of learning to be present with everything that the present moment entails is often that you're able to be more in the present moment in your everyday life. It takes a lot of practice to teach yourself to just be. We're programmed by society to do do do. When unpleasant feelings come up, like boredom or anxiety, we reach for something to self soothe, like daydreaming or scrolling through social media, instead of accepting the feelings and sitting with them. Mindfulness can teach you to be with those feelings and not run from them. But its important to not get attached to some sort of "end goal" when you're practicing mindfulness. I've been doing mindfulness for months/years and I still have some practices when my mind is busy and I spend most of the practice thinking instead of focusing on my breath. I still have trouble with not attaching myself to the goal of being more peaceful (I originally started doing it to help with my anxiety). But like I said, mindfulness isn't about getting anything, its about being. You might get things out of learning to just be, but that's not the goal and you can't focus on those potential outcomes. I can give you some tips for doing it if you'd like, but obviously different things work for different people so I can't guarantee that my tips will be helpful to you.
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