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Post by Dimmer on Mar 30, 2019 22:02:09 GMT
From Parallel Lives, a description and possible explanation for why we daydream torture, abuse and other negative experiences. What do you think?
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Post by Sam on Mar 30, 2019 22:27:31 GMT
Personally, I think I do this because I always overcome whatever happens to me, which is not really what my real life experience feels like. I generally feel incapable of moving past things (in real life), and that feeling gets "fixed" by my imagining overcoming bad situations in my daydreams. Truthfully, it doesn't do anything other than make me feel like crap about not being able to deal with things in real life, but as I'm daydreaming, I momentarily feel better about myself because it makes me feel like I could do those things that daydream-me does (ie overcoming horrible events).
I actually think that it might be my subconscious trying to teach me how to overcome things in my real life. Its not "processing trauma" per se, as obviously I've never been tortured, but I think it might be my subconscious nudging me like, "hey, she can overcome [horrible terrible thing] by doing [x,y,z], so logically you should be able to overcome [unpleasant but slightly less horrible terrible thing] by doing [x,y,z, changed to fit my experiences]."
But I do think that part of the inducing negative emotions is, at least for me, an attempt to process things so that I can get some closure. I often feel a great deal of bitterness and grief toward people who used to be a part of my life, but aren't anymore, and as I never get to express those emotions in real life, daydreaming about being able to confront those people in the way that I want to is, in my opinion, my way of trying to process those emotions. Of course, it doesn't really work, because no matter how real the daydream may feel, I logically know that everyone's reactions to what I am saying are really MY reactions to what I am saying; the ways I wish they would react to what I want to say. Which really isn't a productive way of process things. But as its really my only option, I keep doing it over and over every time I feel those wounds open up.
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Post by trex56 on Mar 31, 2019 23:18:24 GMT
The study is a really interesting read. I feel like it might be a little limited though because there are only 25 participants and most of them are 18 to 25. For me the negative stuff is there so I can imagine scenarios where there is comfort afterwards...It's actually a huge part of what my daydream scenarios are usually about. I thought 'benign masochism' sounded like a bad thing, but I looked it up and apparently eating spicy food falls into that category
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Post by tinyalien on Apr 3, 2019 16:24:13 GMT
From Parallel Lives, a description and possible explanation for why we daydream torture, abuse and other negative experiences. What do you think? Personally it's hard to say. Obviously I enjoy daydreaming and I myself are creating the "bad" or " " images (I even cry, get physically angry or hyped up depending on the DD). I dont always enjoy the daydreams even though I'm creating them. Sometimes I do though because I'm more focused on the other people around me and their actions during these times. but when I am focused on myself within a or upsetting DD I sometimes get the idea that this could actually happen. and I quickly tell myself I'm making this up,There is no reason to be upset and I will stop it For example sometimes I day dream that I've died or that someone I know closely has died, and when I come to the realization that this could really happen and i don't want to think about it, then I stop it. So i guess for the most part even when its I enjoy the act but sometimes the emotions that come with it are too real and I have to calm myself down and remember its not actually happen but the idea that it is a real world possibility makes it harder to calm down when the DD has gotten too intense!!
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