Post by eror on Jan 17, 2020 4:15:01 GMT
I'm quitting MDing. I recently got on medication for bipolar disorder and it's helped my depression so much - and that in turn has significantly reduced my need to MD. The habits are still there though, ingrained with their triggers. I can waste more than half a day daydreaming if given the chance and my legs hurt from pacing so much (I'm worried I'll irreversibly screw them up if I don't stop - if I haven't already). I need to quit before I end up wasting years of my life in a fantasy world that doesn't matter.
I guess this thread is based off Serenity's? It'll be a sort of journal, but I probably won't post often, unless I need to vent or have something interesting to say. I'm posting mainly to keep myself accountable.
Please let me know if you have any tips for quitting! Or let me know about your experiences with quitting (or other people's experiences - serenity's is the only I've looked at).
As day one, I've found myself slipping and quickly pulling myself out of MDing quite a lot. Probably ~20-30 times. It's been hard but I've been doing my best to stop myself. This afternoon I got left alone in the house for an hour (being left alone like this is a huge trigger for me) and not giving in was. Difficult. I ended up playing music and cleaning, trying to ignore the fact that I was alone at all. I think doing something physical was important to keep me from giving in to the urge.
This evening my thoughts feel almost too fast, a little anxious maybe, and I really want to pace around my room right now. I feel kind of like a mess. And I'm a bit sad at the thought of permanently leaving my maladaptive daydreams. They're fun, and part of me is still convinced that they're good for me, that the exercise I get from pacing is worth it.
The current plan is to only let myself daydream while going to bed and while showering, although I'm tempted to allow myself a 30 minute time window to pace. I don't think that would be a good idea though; it'd be so easy to slip like that. Very very tempting though.
I guess this thread is based off Serenity's? It'll be a sort of journal, but I probably won't post often, unless I need to vent or have something interesting to say. I'm posting mainly to keep myself accountable.
Please let me know if you have any tips for quitting! Or let me know about your experiences with quitting (or other people's experiences - serenity's is the only I've looked at).
As day one, I've found myself slipping and quickly pulling myself out of MDing quite a lot. Probably ~20-30 times. It's been hard but I've been doing my best to stop myself. This afternoon I got left alone in the house for an hour (being left alone like this is a huge trigger for me) and not giving in was. Difficult. I ended up playing music and cleaning, trying to ignore the fact that I was alone at all. I think doing something physical was important to keep me from giving in to the urge.
This evening my thoughts feel almost too fast, a little anxious maybe, and I really want to pace around my room right now. I feel kind of like a mess. And I'm a bit sad at the thought of permanently leaving my maladaptive daydreams. They're fun, and part of me is still convinced that they're good for me, that the exercise I get from pacing is worth it.
The current plan is to only let myself daydream while going to bed and while showering, although I'm tempted to allow myself a 30 minute time window to pace. I don't think that would be a good idea though; it'd be so easy to slip like that. Very very tempting though.
