Post by never_one on Feb 13, 2020 1:18:40 GMT
Hi. I'm a 27 year old excessive daydreamer from the Philippines.
I don't even know when this all started but I can date this way back around 2004. I also only found out it has a name (MDD) last year. Now, it is really affecting my job and daily activities.
The problem is, I really enjoy it. If I am capable of putting everything into writing, i'll have binders full of alternate realities and worlds and people that I have created. And the realities I create are mostly based on things that failed to do/wasn't capable to do/just wasn't meant to be/impossible for me as a person. So the realities I created contain a world where all the things I mentioned happened differently. Like, a world where I wasn't born ugly or a world where I was as wise as I am now when I was choosing a profession back in college. Basically all the things that I can no longer change in my life.
I cling so much on certain realities that I sometimes call them my "favorite reality" and i'd daydream about it for hours. I used to have a good balance between daydreaming and living my day-to-day life, but I think i'm losing it. I spend hours in the bathroom just daydreaming and I end up late at work. I spend hours daydreaming of what could have been instead of working on what I can do now. I can feel my mentality declining, especially after my girlfriend recently left me and after I missed a lot of career opportunities. I know I should seek help but I don't know. I still haven't convinced myself to do so.
So yea, that's me. I kinda typed-in a lot in there, sorry. But I know it's gonna be nice in here. So glad I found this place.
I don't even know when this all started but I can date this way back around 2004. I also only found out it has a name (MDD) last year. Now, it is really affecting my job and daily activities.
The problem is, I really enjoy it. If I am capable of putting everything into writing, i'll have binders full of alternate realities and worlds and people that I have created. And the realities I create are mostly based on things that failed to do/wasn't capable to do/just wasn't meant to be/impossible for me as a person. So the realities I created contain a world where all the things I mentioned happened differently. Like, a world where I wasn't born ugly or a world where I was as wise as I am now when I was choosing a profession back in college. Basically all the things that I can no longer change in my life.
I cling so much on certain realities that I sometimes call them my "favorite reality" and i'd daydream about it for hours. I used to have a good balance between daydreaming and living my day-to-day life, but I think i'm losing it. I spend hours in the bathroom just daydreaming and I end up late at work. I spend hours daydreaming of what could have been instead of working on what I can do now. I can feel my mentality declining, especially after my girlfriend recently left me and after I missed a lot of career opportunities. I know I should seek help but I don't know. I still haven't convinced myself to do so.
So yea, that's me. I kinda typed-in a lot in there, sorry. But I know it's gonna be nice in here. So glad I found this place.
