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Post by unlacing on Jul 3, 2019 0:29:23 GMT
I've been excessively daydreaming for most of my life. I always knew that what I was doing wasn't exactly healthy, and I would hide it from the people in my life. It wasn't until a year ago that I discovered maladaptive daydreaming, and knew that it was something that other people were dealing with as well. I discovered this website today, and I have always wanted to connect with people who share this experience with me.
I'm 18 years old, and just finished my first year of university. I was in a dorm room, and had relatively no privacy. My roommate walked in on me daydreaming multiple times, and it was mortifying for me. (when I daydream I rock my head back and forth).I found myself skipping class and planning time to daydream when she wasn't in the room. My mom has walked in on me daydreaming multiple times. I play it off like I am just listening to music intensely, but its always extremely awkward. Last year when I found out there was name for what I had been doing, I told two of my friends. Both of them acted like there was something seriously wrong with me. Since then, I haven't mentioned it to anybody else in my life. I am seeing a therapist for the first times in 2 years on Monday, and I'm unsure how to bring up the topic, or if I even should at all.
I suffer from anxiety and depression, and have always thought of my daydreaming being a way for me to cope with my loneliness. I was raised by a single mother who worked long hours, so I spent a lot of my childhood alone. When I got older, my anxiety stopped me from doing a lot and daydreaming was an easy thing for me to turn to. For a long time, I didn't see anything wrong with my daydreaming. It has been my escape from reality, and compared to my other coping mechanisms it seemed relatively healthy. But I spend all my free time doing it. If I'm not working, or I'm not at school, I'm always daydreaming. Even on days where I do work, I will wake up at 5 in the morning just so I can spend a couple hours daydreaming before my early shifts.
It's interfering with so much of my life, but it's hard for me to even want to stop. Daydreaming makes up for a lot of the things I feel like I'm missing out on. It adds an element of excitement that my life is lacking. But it makes me feel pathetic that I spend the majority of my free time self-indulging on my fantasies.
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Post by Sam on Jul 3, 2019 1:20:30 GMT
Welcome to the forum! A lot of what you're experiencing really resonates with me on a personal level. Whether we consciously recognize it or not, I think that most of us are using daydreaming as a coping method. Like you mentioned, it seems to be more healthy than other coping mechanisms I have. Its not damaging me physically (beyond some occasional sore muscles and tension headaches), and since I walk up and down the stairs while daydreaming, you could argue that its actually benefitting me by giving me exercise. But the thing that a lot of people don't realize is that while daydreaming may not have the physically damaging effects that, say harming yourself or engaging in risky behavior might, it does still harm you, at least on a psychological level. Your brain releases feel-good endorphins when you're daydreaming and those feel-good endorphins are addicting. Not only that, but by spending so much time in a fantasy world, you're isolating yourself in real life and hurting your ability to connect with others and deal with real life emotions and situations. There are a few threads on here that are related to things that you mentioned. This thread and this thread talk about telling others and this thread is on loneliness both caused by and as a trigger for maladaptive daydreaming. If you look around the forum I'm sure that you'll find much more that might help you. I hope that you find the community that you're looking for here.
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Post by unlacing on Jul 3, 2019 2:58:34 GMT
Thank you so much for the reply and for directing me to those forums! I really appreciate it!
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Post by Dimmer on Jul 3, 2019 23:07:34 GMT
Welcome to the forum!
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Post by alvi on Jul 4, 2019 1:22:09 GMT
Welcome to the forum
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hanaiyah
New Daydreamer
Self-Acceptance is the way forward!
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Post by hanaiyah on Jul 4, 2019 17:51:09 GMT
welcome to the forum
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